I feel a little funny posting about 9-11 today because I know everyone will be posting about it in some way and how many reminders do any of us need? None, I'm thinking. I seriously doubt that anyone who lived through that day in any capacity needs a single reminder, but then again, maybe I'm wrong. And maybe it is just therapeutic to do a little remembering--not to mention that the people who died that day or lost someone they loved deserve that moment.
So, remember. Where were you? When did you hear? Is it cemented into your brain? It is in mine. Four days earlier I had given birth to my son via an emergency c-section. That same day (the day that he was born) I had come home from the hospital (in the middle of labor) and found our dog who we loved more than anything at the time had died on our living room floor. I had been in the hospital recovering from the surgery and the sheer shock of both our dog's death and the emergency nature of my son's birth (and the knowledge that he like my daughter had cystic fibrosis). September 11, 2001 was my first full day back in real life.
I went in and turned on the TV and there it was--the first plane had already hit. Firemen were rushing inside. I remember standing there wanting to scream at the TV--"What are you doing? Don't go in there!" But they did, and then the second plane hit and the building collapsed. It was surreal. It was a nightmare and it just wasn't supposed to happen damn it.
The country went into shock. I think sometimes people in NY don't realize how much people in the rest of the country shared their pain. I don't say this to minimize what NY was going through--not one little bit. Just to let those in NY know that we really truly did. Life wasn't normal here; it was muted. You would go into the grocery store and peoples' faces were haunted. A cloud hung everywhere. We watched the TV, we tried to understand, and we couldn't. Because there was no good explanation. There was no rational reason for what happened. And trying to make sense of it felt as futile as screaming at that TV for those firefighters not to enter the building.
So, there you have it, that's my memory of 9-11. Maybe some day I will be able to write an essay like this without crying--but I doubt it.
Hugs to all,